April 02, 2008

And it burns, burns, burns.....

It is 2am. I am awake. I am having my first official hot flash of the cycle. Jeez! I feel like I am personally responsible for global warming at this moment.

Also - I am having some serious cramping from the Cytotec I took (vaginally) to prepare for the laminaria. Ouch. Ouch. Ouch.

And I am feeling more than a little apprehensive about tomorrow's (today's really) appointment for the laminaria placement. I pride myself on having a pretty high pain tolerance - but when my Dr. had to crank open my cervix for my hysteroscopy I was in a good amount of pain for several days after. I have been warned (thanks to Jen and to my nurse, Amber) that this will be a lot worse.

Originally Mr. Spicy was supposed to come with me. But he just got back from a business trip and we have family coming into town on Thu so he really was feeling anxious about not dealing with some things at work since he's been away from the office and his team for over a week. And I was in a particularly giving and gracious mood (recognizing how much he has already been here for me in this, that he doesn't really need any added reason to stress right now, and since he is the only one working in this family at the moment - there ought to be some concessions for that) and I told him I would be fine without him. Even he was questioning me on this - but at the moment I was enjoying being all giving and strong and zen. So I assured him I would be ok without him there. What the hell? Who do I think I am? The truth is, I will probably be fine - I will have a local during the procedure, so the pain probably won't even kick in until hours later. But I am feeling a bit like a baby right now about it all and wishing I had someone to come hold my hand. Sigh. I should have thought about this sooner and called a friend. Too late now.

Ok. Well. I am going to go turn the heat off and go back to bed. Oh, the heat's not on? Nice.

Also, how do you put your head in the freezer if your freezer is on the bottom of your fridge instead of the top? Did anyone think about that when they designed those things? Ha! Probably not!


Anonymous said...

Good luck today Duffy. Every appt is one step closer to that baby. I wish there was something I could do to hold your hand from here, but alas there isn't. I wish you a pain-free procedure and a nice cool day. Hugs!

annacyclopedia said...

Hope it all goes well today and it doesn't hurt too much, even after. I'll be holding your hand in my mind all day. And I'll bring a fan so I can fan you during those glowy moments.

Jen said...

I'm wishing you luck today. And I am curious, I never had the cytotec. I wonder what it does really.

And I just wanted to warn you of the pain so you'd be prepared. When I went for the HSG I was told to experience pain, and I felt nothing. Then I wasn't prepped for the lam placement and it was bad.

I am hoping though the cytotec will take away some of the pain.

And can you have no one drive you home?